In the public imagination, the mental health condition post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is commonly associated with violent, physical trauma, such as being in combat or suffering a sexual assault. But trauma isn’t always dramatic and isn’t just experienced by soldiers and first responders.
You can experience a variety of traumas, both in your childhood and in adulthood. Some traumas are physical — like being abused or attacked. Others are emotional — such as suffering neglect or ridicule.
Even if you don’t think of yourself as having PTSD, you may still carry past traumas that negatively affect your life. Unresolved trauma has serious implications for your well-being. Trauma is considered to be the primary cause of death for people aged 1-46.
At The Soho Center for Mental Health Counseling, our expert counselors help you identify and resolve past traumas that give you trouble today. If you struggle with mood, substance abuse, or relationships, trauma therapy can help you get past the past, enjoy your present, and plan for your future.
Is unresolved trauma holding you back? Following are five signs that it might be.
If you grew up in a household where you had to work hard to earn your parents’ attention, or if they held you to unrealistic standards, you may struggle with people pleasing or perfectionism. If you’re a people pleaser, you may put your genuine needs and thoughts to the side to win the approval of others.
If you’re a perfectionist, you may judge yourself too harshly. That judgment may be so harsh that you may find it difficult or impossible to complete projects satisfactorily.
As a people pleaser or perfectionist, you may find it difficult to associate trauma with your family of origin. You may feel guilty about holding your caregivers responsible for your struggles, because they may not have knowingly abused you.
However, you can acknowledge their deficits without blame. Once you resolve that “hidden” trauma, you’re better able to be authentic and approach tasks without constantly judging yourself.
Maybe you’re a “commitment-phobe” who jumps from relationship to relationship. Or maybe you just don’t bother.
Both having a multitude of relationships and avoiding them altogether are signs that you’ve been hurt or disappointed in the past and are trying to avoid that in the future. You may have an attachment wound from your childhood that’s causing you to constantly look for love … or avoid it.
Often buried trauma manifests as physical symptoms. You may come from a culture where it’s not considered appropriate to feel sad, angry, or depressed.
Instead of expressing your feelings, you suppress them. They then manifest as ailments such as stomach pain. However, the stress of suppressing emotions can also unleash chemical changes in your body that result in real physical harm.
Your emotional distress may also interfere with important activities such as sleeping, eating, and exercising. When you don’t get proper sleep, nutrition, or movement, that affects your mood and your health. You may need both counseling and medical help to get back on track.
When you’re addicted to alcohol or recreational drugs, it may be a sign that you struggle with unresolved trauma. The pain from the past is so severe that you turn to substances to numb your feelings.
You may not even remember what triggered this pain. It may have happened so early in your childhood that it isn’t part of your consciousness. Or, you might have experienced chronic stress from living with abuse, substance abuse, or financial insecurity in your family or origin.
If you use alcohol or drugs to help you cope with life, you’d benefit from substance abuse counseling, too. Gradually, as you resolve your trauma, learn new coping skills, and use medications to control cravings, you break the habit of self-medication.
Like substances, food can be a source of comfort. Binge-eating may be a sign that you’re using food to self-medicate.
Other eating disorders, such as bulimia and anorexia nervosa, are also associated with trauma. The National Eating Disorder Association states that physical and emotional trauma is a risk factor for binge eating, anorexia, and bulimia.
In addition to trauma counseling, we would recommend treatment for your eating disorder, too. We work with your primary care physician to develop a program that helps you learn to nourish your body while you resolve your past or present trauma.
Is unresolved trauma behind your current struggles? To find out more about trauma and get the help you need to resolve it, contact our helpful office staff for an in-person appointment at our Greenwich Village offices in New York City, New York. You can also request HIPAA-compliant teletherapy sessions.
