4 Reasons to Seek Professional Self-Esteem Support

If you feel like you aren’t all that you “should” be or could be, or that you don't deserve to be happy, you have plenty of company. Astonishingly, researchers have determined that roughly 85% of women, men, and adolescents have low self-esteem. 

Self-esteem is your overall view of yourself and your place in the world. It can include how confident you feel in your abilities, your appreciation (or lack thereof) of your specific talents and accomplishments, and whether you feel like a success, a failure, or no good at all.

If you have low self esteem, you might engage in risky activities, act out, or neglect your needs. Low self-esteem is associated with:

• Violence or aggression
• Teenage pregnancy
• Low academic achievement
• High dropout rate
• Destructive relationships
• Difficulty at work
• Suicidal ideation or behaviors

Low self-esteem is a serious condition. At best, it prevents you from becoming all that you’re capable of being. At worst, it could lead to dangerous situations or even death. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that more women, men, and adolescents die from suicide than from homicide or war. 

If you feel unsatisfied with your life or if you judge yourself harshly, you may suffer from low self-esteem. Our expert counselors at The Soho Center for Mental Health Counseling offer self-esteem support at our offices in Greenwich Village, New York City, New York, and via teletherapy.

Should you seek professional help for self-esteem? The following questions can help you decide.

1. Do you worry a lot about what others think?

Although we all want to be accepted and loved by those we respect, if you constantly worry about being judged by others, you may have low self-esteem. You may stress over what to wear, how to behave, and whether you look good enough, sound smart enough, or know what to do and how to do it.

You may even avoid social situations because you’re afraid of being embarrassed or judged. If you worry too much about what others think of you, you might miss opportunities — such as a promotion at work — because you’re afraid of how others might respond to you.

2. Are you obsessed with your relationships?

If you have low self-esteem, relationships may be difficult for you. You might develop unrequited crushes that you obsess over. Or, if you’re in a relationship, you could be constantly worried that it won’t work out.

You may work extra hard at your intimate relationships or even your friendships, in an attempt to “win” people over and keep them in your life. You may also have poor boundaries and have difficulty saying “no” — even when it’s in your best interest — because you don’t want to endanger that relationship.

3. Do you give up easily?

All successful people fail. Successful people, in fact, fail more than others. Why? Because they have high enough self-esteem that they can keep going, even when faced with seemingly insurmountable challenges.

They also don’t take their failures personally. Instead, they look for the lesson so that they can learn from the failure and do a better job the next time.

Does that sound like you? Or are you the opposite? If you quit when the going gets tough, or if you feel like the deck is stacked against you, you could have low self-esteem.

You may feel like you’re protecting yourself by quitting before you suffer the “humiliation" of failure. Instead, you’re cheating yourself of an opportunity to grow and become the person you really want to be… and can be.

4. Do you take forever to decide?

Is it hard for you to make decisions, because you’re afraid you’ll choose the “wrong” thing? Do you agonize over picking an item from a dinner menu, while your tablemates wait for you?

Do you worry about what to do, when to do it, or if you should do it at all? Indecisiveness is a hallmark of low self-esteem. You can’t decide because you’re afraid you’ll make the wrong choice, have regrets, and feel like a failure.

Your self-esteem was formed by forces external to you, such as your environment, family, and friends. You can, however, learn to change your self-perception and develop higher self-esteem with the help of expert counselors who teach you new ways to talk to yourself.

Get help with self-esteem support so you can fail more, fail better, and — ultimately — succeed in getting the life you want and deserve. Call or schedule an online appointment with our helpful office staff for self-esteem support. You may also choose convenient, HIPAA-compliant teletherapy sessions.